Conditions of Use

First And Foremost

1) Ich spreche nicht Deutsches
2) Je ne parle pas français
3) No hablo español
4) Ik spreek het geen Nederlands
5) Δεν μιλώ τα ελληνικά
6) En puhu suomea
7) Non parlo Italiano
8) Eu não falo Portugese
9) Я не говорю русского

So stop sending me messages in languages other than English!!!!

Payment

1. Payment via PayPal is definitely preferred, but I accept all forms of payment. This includes BidPay, checks, money orders, cash, and barter.

2. If you wish to mail a payment, the address is P.O. Box 33021, Palm Beach Gardens, FL 33410.

3. If you buy an item and do not pay for it (or at least contact me) within eight days, I will summon Ozzy to bite your head off.

Photos

People often ask about the item photos. Hopefully this will answer some questions before you e-mail me.

1. Anything that is small enough, I put right onto the scanner and scan it. This applies to patches, most stickers, and smaller items like wristbands or magnets. The scanning brings out a ton of detail (including the cat hair on the scanner glass).

2. Larger stuff, like shirts and bandannas, I photograph. I am a pretty poor photographer, so the photos are usually not so great. But I do my best.

3. For the textile posters, I use the photos from the manufacturer. They are small, yeah, I know. Seriously, though, the textile posters are beautiful and awesomely detailed. You will love them.

4. Some of my photos just suck. I really am not good at photography. Sorry. If you see something that looks really crappy, please let me know so I can take a new photo of it.

Shit happens.

Okay, I admit it, I am a little irresponsible. Here are some things I have been known to do in the past.

1. Mail empty envelopes.
2. Mail the wrong colour or design.
3. Have things that I am taking to the post office mysteriously end up under the passenger seat of the car.
4. Not realize that someone ordered more than one of the same thing, and only mail one.
5. Lose things that are for sale. My cat\'s fault--she steals patches!

Anyway, please, if any of this stuff happens to you, just drop a line and let me know...nicely. I am just human, and there is only one of me. And I will set it right, so no worries.

Just Fucking Ask!!

If you are looking for a certain band or item, or just have something to say, go ahead! This is not your typical sterile web entity. I am a real person who loves metal as much as anyone else, so get off your ass and e-mail me with anything you have to say.

The Cat Hair Disclaimer

I live in a house with three cats. If you purchase something from me that involves cloth (i.e., a shirt or textile poster), and you are allergic to cats, PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I try to keep the apparel away from cat hair, but unfortunately it just finds it anyway. You cat people know how it is. If you tell me, I can run it through the clothes washer once before mailing it, thus sparing you any undue discomfort.

Furthermore, here is a list of some other random things which could possibly end up in your order.

1) flyers
2) CD samplers
3) my hair
4) guitar picks
5) coffee grounds

Take It Easy On Me!

I am only one person. I have a "real" job, and am also usually a full-time student as well. I am a painfully Type A personality and am typically high-strung and completely stressed out. And sometimes I am not as quick on the draw as I would like to be. So if I dont get back to you immediately or your item does not get mailed out as soon as you think it should have, please do not bug out on me. Show some freaking sympathy.

A few rules

Be metal.
Two: Do not abuse the system.
Three: Do not ever, EVER use the Reviews feature to flame a band. Not even if that band is Linkin Park. If you want to flame a band, use the forum. Mmmmmetal.